There is a certain macabre pleasure in languishing in your own private den of misery. One's id tends to stoke the fires of self-pity and encourages the feelings of "poor me" within. It is a twisted proposition of the inability to be happy unless one is unhappy.

Is it selfish to dwell on one's petty problems? To delve into the minutiae and cling onto every little bit of resentment felt, conceived or otherwise? Given the greater issues of the world at stake, are we perhaps a bit too self-indulgent in thinking only of the self and the now?

If you were the one allowed to issue the choices, then, perhaps you would be better in control. But if you were on the other end of the short stick, and been issued the choice... then perhaps you're not quite as well off as you wish you could be.

It's all a tangled web of confusion, uncertainty and yet, that tiny bit of excitement and anticipation. Till it all unravels...

You Drink To Forget.

Trust is an amazing thing...

It's a little like Faith. It makes you believe even if everything around you tells you not to. Trust is that little extra bit of good faith and good will that you extend towards someone because that person means something to you and you believe that the person will never do anything to hurt you. It gives you a sense of security in a time of chaos.

It's easy to say you trust someone. But the truth is, trust often lies only on the surface. It's only when you can rest easy at night without the voices whispering and making you toss and turn in bed, that you can say there really is trust. Trust is when the person you love says someone else is gorgeous/beautiful and you don't feel a stab of jealousy because you know that you mean more to the person.

Trust is not an easy thing to give if you have not been proven that your trust should be given.

I love that out here, the air is fresher and things are much simpler.

People are friendly and they accept you for who you are.

I like being here. My mind is clear to think about things.

It's all really new. And I haven't quite wrapped my head around it. Part of me is still waiting for the bubble to burst and I'd wake up realizing it's only a dream. Another part of me is revelling in the moment. I love that despite being me, it's still all good.

How long will it last? I'm scared to think about it.

Today's weather has been fully sick.

I was out on Bridge Road for a little shop and practically burnt myself walking around the shop. It didn't help that the winds were so warm, it made me feel like a slow-basting roast in the oven. Now the weather's dropped at least ten or more degrees and it's raining out.

Melbourne weather is whacked....

I feel sick.

HAPPINESS IS...

Booking your ticket to Sydney for the Easter Weekend.

Woohoo!!!!!!!!!

Dior and Fendi...Here, I come!!!!!!!!!!!

Hah! I am a genius....

Ok, ok...I know anyone can add music to their blogs but you have to understand that I'm a total computer idiot and for me to figure out how to add a new layout to my blog and actually learn how to upload songs and add it to my blog is a total triumph for me!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so pleased with myself!

In other news, I finally jumped onto the MYSPACE wagon....

hee hee

*dances around in glee*

It was fun to play around with an idealistic fantasy but I think we all have to come back to reality in the end.

Who am I fooling when I tell myself that it will work out? Nobody but myself. Sometimes timing and circumstances are everything; in my case, I've never been able to find the right time or situation.

A part of me got over you and the sensible part of me tells me that it's not worth it and I should move on. The sentimental part of me still misses you because on some level, you were the only one who showed even the slightest interest. Call me needy but I am the first to admit that I do tend to give my heart easily to anyone who shows me the slightest bit of interest.

I'm probably really f*cked up in the head and lord knows, I have issues...I'm trying to deal with them but sometimes, I really wonder if I can be bothered.

Not pretty enough. Not thin enough. Not healthy enough. Not good enough. And the list goes on.